"I count myself one of the number of those who write as they learn and learn as they write." ~St. Augustine

Monday, April 30, 2012

To Borrow Worry again... and again...

His face was painted with worry.  What is wrong, sweet boy? Why that face?

In response, he broke down in tears.  Almost sobbing uncontrollably, he told me about all the things he had to get done for school.  He just knew that he wasn't going to be able to get it all done!

In that moment, he just knew that the day would be a failure.  Anyone looking on would have seen utter frustration and despair coming out in tears down his freckled face.  My sweet boy...  He is only ten years old.  But, sometimes even he, this light-hearted soul, feels overwhelmed and worried.

I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he would be just fine.  I knew he would have plenty of time to finish it all.  I knew, in fact, that he would have time to spare and much room to play!  But no words could convince his determined heart.  He just wouldn't believe me.  Does God ever feel this way, I wonder?

I knew He need not worry!  I knew it would all be fine... he would be fine.  But, his heart was convinced otherwise.  And so he despaired.  He worried.  He cried and lamented.

At about 4:00 this afternoon I found this same sweet boy playing on the computer.  He loves his computer-time play!  I found him here playing and creating a world on his favorite game.  He saw me and wanted to show me the digital world he is creating.  I enjoyed it and entered into his play world for a moment.

Then, I asked him...

This morning, son, you were very worried.  Were you borrowing worry, my sweet boy?  

With a sheepish, but tenderly sweet grin, he said, Yep.  Yeah... I was.  

Was it worth it?  Did it help you?  Was it necessary, my sweet boy?  

No!!  he replied, it never is!  

And then he paused and said with a confusing look and a quirky smile,  But, Mom, I seem to forget that when I am worried.  When I am in the middle of worrying, I can't seem to remember!

Me, too, son.  Me, too!

It has been said that our anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, but only empties today of its strength.  ~Charles Spurgeon