"I count myself one of the number of those who write as they learn and learn as they write." ~St. Augustine

Thursday, February 10, 2022

Okay, Lord

 


Okay, Lord.  Here we go!

There are just days that start off with difficulty after a long night of tossing and turning, aren’t there?  Sleep evades and rest is nowhere to be found.  Do you ever have these nights?  Last night was one of those nights.  I took the advice of a friend and didn’t look at the clock.  Instead, as I tossed, I prayed, Lord, is there anyone that you would have me pray for?  As, I turned, I prayed, Father, is there anything you want to tell me or show me?  I guess it is going to be one of those nights…  Okay, Lord.  Here we go! 

Faces came to mind.  Names flooded in.  I asked.  I prayed.  I held them before the Lord.  So… sleep wasn’t the gift He gave last night, but He did give His rest to my heart and I did talk to Him about a great many things.

It was nearly morning, after a short ‘night-nap’, when I woke with a piece of Scripture flooding into my mind…  Ah, I thought, something He must want to tell me!  I meditated on the Word and said, Thank you, Lord.   

When the alarm finally sounded, it was tug and a pull to yank myself out of bed.  Do you ever feel you just have to coerce yourself out of bed?   Okay, Lord!  Here we go! Please sustain me.  I could feel His whisper deep within--- His promise to be with me always.  Tired and chilled by the cold dark, I could feel in my body the roughness of the night’s toss and turn.  One step in front of the other, I slowly walked out the aches and stumbled tentatively downstairs. 

After a quick drink of water, as is my habit and daily routine, I sat in my living room chair and opened up the PrayAsYouGo app on my phone… the call to prayer, the Scripture being read, the music, the questions and the reflection are all a great way to open my heart and waken my mind to His Presence.  Lord, I’m tired.  Help me to hear what You are saying.  Open my eyes and make me awake to Your Presence today, I wrote in my journal. 

After the app finished, I picked up my Bible.  I found the red tassel showing where I left off yesterday and continued reading in Luke 6.  Jesus tells His disciples to give and to forgive… reminding them that His Father is a merciful Father.  We are told to be like Him …merciful.  With the reading of the Word, I am struck with such thanksgiving---energizing and heart-lifting worship--- Lord, thank you for loving us!  Thank you for Your mercy and the gift of Jesus!   I wrote in my journal, Lord, only in you will I live this giving, forgiving, merciful life.  Please fill me with the power of Your Spirit to be like You, my good and merciful Father!  As I continue to read, there was conviction in my heart. I read Christ’s words to ‘not condemn and not judge’.  Readily my sin of judgment---of myself and of others---came to mind.  Lord, forgive me. Make me more like You. Make me merciful.      

After my quiet moments with God, I got up to put my shoes on… heading out to the garage-gym to use an exercise video.  Okay, Lord, here we go!  Layered up against the cold, I could feel and see the steam of my breath, I turned on the video and started to ‘walk’ following along with the lady on the TV.  She was speaking of Jesus as we walked and she encourages us to pray… and I do. 

I feel a bit heart-heavy with the many needs of those I love.  As I walk, I pray.  As the Lord brings a face, or a problem to mind, I pray and ask God to fix, help, and be near.  Father, please help.  As I stretch after the work-out, one particular person weighs heavy this morning.  My heart is pained for them.  They don’t know Jesus and they are running hard into destructive life choices that will bring much pain and sorrow.  Oh Lord have mercy.  Spirit of the Living God reveal Jesus to them!  Lord, please open their eyes and rescue them from darkness.  May they be released from these prisons of sin that keep them from full life.  Oh Lord, please help, please fix this, please be near. 

As I finished up my exercise, I can feel energy and sustenance in my body, and I am grateful!  Thank you, Lord.   I can feel the hunger rise up.   As I go inside to prepare my breakfast, I pray for my kids.   Lord, please give them a hunger and a thirst for righteousness and Your truth.  Help them the choose You today. 

This day began with the night of tossing and turning… and in this, He led me and strengthened me to pray and remain aware of His Presence.  Thus far, we have had so much conversation….and, it’s only 9 am! 

This day is Yours, Lord!  Have Your way in and through me.  Teach me to pray.  What might the day bring?  Okay, Lord! Here we go!