Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Yes, forgiveness IS hard
Months and months ago she had been hurt by someone. At the time, this hurt had felt like an injustice and a misuse of power. It had made her angry then; but, the anger had subsided and we had moved on.
Or, so I thought.
Randomly, the topic came up this morning. Her mind and heart were reminded and from nowhere (or so it seemed) came the torrent of frustration, hurt and anger.
It is amazing what can remain alive in our hearts. In an instant, she was remembering and angry again. Very angry. This wound had sat and stewed inside for months...
As she shared her heart, I embraced her and listened to her. I validated the pain, the hurt and her frustration. I, too, would feel the very same way, I told her.
As she calmed a bit, I asked her if she had forgiven this person. Not surprisingly, she said, "no". She wasn't sure she wanted to. This is hard!
Oh! how I can relate!
He was wrong. He had misjudged and hurt her. It was unfair!
I agreed again.
Yes, he was wrong. Yes, it was unfair. And... And,...yet was she still willing to forgive him? She didn't want to. She really didn't want to! Tenseness and anger began to rise.
Gently, I suggested she ask Jesus for help.
Our brother, Jesus, knows very well what it was to be hurt, to be judged unfairly, and to be wronged. And, yet, He forgave.
He knows how and can help her even now. And, quietly I mentioned, aren't you glad He forgave even when it was hard. When you didn't deserve it! Her tense body seemed to melt in my arms at the thought. Yes! Yes! I could hear her spirit agreeing with the gratefulness of my spirit--the joy of our salvation!
I am so glad He forgave when He was so very wronged.
She decided to forgive today. And, she decided to bless. She prayed blessing over him and I watched her anger subsided. I watched peace come and joy replace tense frustration. I watched beauty and calm fill her.
Yes, my sweet, darling girl... forgiveness IS hard! But, we can learn. And, oh!, what a wonderful gift.