"I count myself one of the number of those who write as they learn and learn as they write." ~St. Augustine

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Crashing Lies... calming Truth

Sometimes a lie comes crashing into my heart.

Sometimes my mind is flooded with doubts and lies--the stream of accusation sending me on a distracted journey into guilt---a dangerous terrain.

This morning a lie crashed in and tried it's best to carry me away.  Today it was, "Your not doing enough".

  ..."not enough" hissed through the beginnings of my quiet time with the Lord.

I wrestled with these words, these thoughts.  Just before I was swept away, I uttered a slight quiet prayer, something like "Lord have mercy on me"... but coming forth from my lips as a deep sigh and an "ugh!!"

In response, I instantly felt prompted to pick up His Word and read.  Read truth.

As I opened God's Word, light streamed in and the noisy lies ceased.  As if a direct answer to the streaming lie, I read, "Jesus gave them this answer:  I  tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can only do what he sees the Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does.  For the Father loves the Son and shows Him all He is doing."  (John 5:19)

Jesus was being accused by the Jews.  Lies crashed all around him.  They didn't like what He was doing or who He was.  They accused Him and tried to destroy Him. (John 5:18). In response to the accusation, he answered  them with the simplicity of His relationship to the Father.  He pointed to the Father.  And, He pointed to His actions as an extension of the Father's will.

He rested in the security of doing what the Father wanted Him to do.  Case closed.  End of story.

I have an accuser.  And, this accuser speaks only one language:  lies.  Lying is his mother-tongue.  Jesus always answered accusation with Truth.  He always speaks truth.

Now, granted, Jesus was much better than I at knowing the Father's will and His desires.   His clarity and discernment were unhindered by sin. Certainly sin and self often hinder my ability to know what the Father would have me do.  And yet.

And yet...  I am His.  I am asking.  And, I am attempting to listen, to follow and to do.  Failures and all...

...it is the deepest desire of my heart to do the Father's will.  I long, Father, to join You and to walk with You and do exactly what you would have me do today!  

So, when the "not enough" lie pummels my mind again, I will answer it with the truth that, Stephanie can do nothing by herself.  She can only do what she sees the Father doing!  And, her Father loves her and will show her what to do today.  
And, truth calms the crashing lies.

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