We need guidance. We need someone to show us the way from time to time. Somtimes we just need a talkin' to. We need a good 'ol in-your-face talkin' to from those we who love us and those we love.
We do it as parents, don't we? I do it. My husband does it. He and I give our "talks" very differently, to be sure; but, none-the-less, it is the loving thing to do. To sit them down (our kids), get face to face and tell them how it really is. We need to show them where they are going wrong and point them in the right direction. This is simple, beautiful discipline and training.
God is no different. And, yesterday, I got a good 'ol talkin' to.
Gentleness and kindness surrounded the "talk". His lecture was wrapped in His goodness and His love; but, it is painful even so. Who likes to get a talkin' to?
He spoke to me about my pride.
Ugly and damaging, my pride. He spoke to me about my "self-life". And, He did this using a good friend (one I have never met), A.W. Tozer in the Pursuit of God,
"What is the veil that it shutting out the light and hiding the face of God from us. It is the close-woven veil of the self-life... it is not too mysterious, this opaque veil, nor is it hard to identify. We have but to look in our own hearts and we shall see it there, sewn and patched and repaired it may be, but there nevertheless, an enemy to our lives and an effective block to our spiritual progress. It is not a beautiful thing and it is not a thing about which we commonly care to talk, but I am addressing the thristy souls who are determined to follow God... To be specific, the self-sins are these: self-righteousness, self-admiration, self-love, [self-pity and selfishness] and a host of others like them."
The interesting thing is that as I read this chapter and thought on God's words to my heart, I instantly found myself trying to "fix it" in me. Deep within, I was calculating how I could become less prideful, less self-centered, less self-righteous...
Do you see it? Do you see that right there in the very moment of conviction I was running back to self. My plans. My ways. My fixes.
At least my heart caught it this time! Thank you, Spirit of God!
The dawning of His Spirit brought these words to mind, "I can do nothing... without the Father". (John 5:19)
Then, Thomas a Kempis, has some words for me, as well. He agrees and joins in with God's discipline: "Rest not upon thyself, but build thy hope in God. Do only what lieth in your power and God will help thy good intent. The poor and lowly of heart abide in the multitude of peace. The man who is not yet wholly dead to self is soon tempted, and is overcome in small and trifiling matters."
And, to top it off, this joint intervention comes back to Tozer, instructing me with, "God must do everything for us. Our part is to yield and trust."
There it is again... that word!! Trust. Will I ever learn it, Father?
Trust breaks down pride and self. Trust is the rock on which humility is built.
I have so much to learn. I am so glad He never gives up on me and keeps talkin' to me!
Open my eyes to see You and know You as You really are. Open my ears. Grow my faith and teach me to trust You. Enlarge my soul to understand, to know, to perceive. Strengthen my mind to grasp You. You alone. Jesus, work Yourself in me! You in me. Me-dead and the real alive in You.
It is very sweet to know that we are not alone on our road toward and with God. This post from another friend, (I have never met ---smile), propelled me to write down today's small jot from my journey to know Him more. I would highly recommending popping over to her site: You are My Girls.